The Fear of Happiness

It didn’t hit me till this week, while working with a number of clients, how personal and spiritual growth can not only be so liberating but also very challenging and almost impossible for some. I remember in one of my favorite movies, The Matrix, the star, Neo played by Keanu Reeves, was cornered by Agents at his job. Much like real life, he was also given a way out by Morpheus (who was trying to free his mind).

Morpheus instructed Neo that he could escape via scaffolding up to a roof exit…high atop a skyscraper, but chose the Agents (the lower route in a matter of speaking) due to his fear of heights. He made the mistake of looking down, another great analogy and said, “I can’t do this!”

Fear is the main ingredients that freeze many when it comes to moving forward and growing. The old mind patterns of low self worth, not being good enough and fear of change; keep many hostages in their perceived world. Many use the philosophy of already knowing the devil they know… as a safer route, than venturing out into uncharted territory that would be for their higher good. There are other reasons… not willing to forgive self and others, but mainly self, that keeps the mind patterns of less serving, low vibration energy… attracting yet another situation to reinforce the false beliefs their understanding and ego has taught them. In this they feel safe.

The fact is there is no safety in this, locked in the chains of the old thought pattern, reliving day after day, week after week, month after month the same drama and codependent dysfunctional experiences.

Why is this happening many say, why to me? What changed from when I was a child and my expectations were high and everything seemed easy? What changed?

Your mind changed. Somewhere between being born and today, you learned that you were not worthy or not good enough or weren’t worth forgiving. In most cases we learn that as children from those we love like our parents and those we look up to. Somewhere in our outer self, the ego, because of our experience with those people who were responsible for our mental development starting from as young as one or two years old, we were taught these things about us or life by living through someone else’s eyes.

Have you had a mom or a dad that was divorced while you were at a young age and because of that you lost a father or mother from your life? Or did their belief create conditions that attracted unfavorable situations to them like a bread winner that didn’t really take care of the family, or an abusive relationship or were you left high and dry and at a young age and made to fend for yourself? They say those kind of situations are character builders but the truth is they instill a false sense of reality created by someone else… a fear!

I have had at least a couple of clients, both female and male where their family carried down through a couple of generations that of divorce and abuse. Because of this, the children were taught the same and carried the same ego system that created those experiences in their parent’s life and now in theirs. It is not until this old energy is dismantled and released does the pattern change.

These conditions do not just apply to relationships but also to lifestyles. Have you every noticed a lack of disregard as it relates to someone when it comes to their safety? Someone who is either abusing their body with food, drugs, alcohol, danger? These are all part of an addictive pattern of disregard for themselves because in the heart of their ego, their belief system… they don’t believe they are worthy, nor are they good enough and because of that belief system, they continue living out their beliefs.

Remember, whatever you believe you outpicture in your world!

Obese people create a sort of emotional insulation to protect them from emotional abuse. On the opposite end of the coin some extremely thin people outpicture a similar condition with a frail, weak body… depicting their drained life force. Drug abusers delve into an altered sense of reality, much like the obese, to insulate themselves from deep down feelings that they may not even know exist… a pattern because they can not find the happiness inside themselves… so they search elsewhere. Many adrenalin junkies do the same thing; defy danger looking to get instant gratification from something on the outside, the rush, much like the drug user.

These addictions become friends in many cases… those you can’t live with and can’t live without. It is almost as if you have a marriage of sorts. As with marriage there is one thing that is the cure of all ailments, conditions and situations… love! The key though is not love received from someone else, that would be putting the horse before the carriage but love for your Self! Unless you love yourself you can not truly love another as we are all one.

Many of my writings reflect on this statement. Love for yourself is the most important step in disbanding and dissolving these rogue thought patterns that do not serve you.

So what is the opposite of love? Fear!

Fear binds you in chains and keeps you frozen. It keeps you in a constant state of unforgiving by allowing the old patterns to run thus blocking love and forgiveness for all experiences you created or learned and then perceived through your five senses. It is a viscous cycle that can be broken by simply making a decision.

Someone asked me, how do you master that condition? The answer is so simple yet difficult. Before any thing, any instant, any move is made, there is a moment where you can make a choice. It is in this moment that mastery occurs! Take the high road.

There is no past, it is but a memory that does not exist… there is no future to fear, you can’t live in the future, it is impossible. All there is IS NOW! Change the present and you change the past and the future. Quantum physics proves it.

The choices start small and get bigger and as they get bigger they get better.

Choose… to be whole, thus your eating habits will reflect that. Choose freedom thus say NO to abuse or alcohol abuse, choose love, thus NOT be in an abusive relationship… change the choice, change the thought pattern and change the outcome. Choose to be happy! Don’t fear the change, fear is a low vibration.

Allow your Self to love and be loved, allow yourself to receive. Know you deserve the best. Start with you, begin to love yourself. Be kind to yourself. You will find that you will attract like.

The special someone you have wanted will be there if you allow yourself to see him or her.

The work which you always desired will present itself IF you’re not afraid to take a step forward.

An amazing opportunity will miraculously appear if you realize it is not too good to be true! It is not a miracle but the law of attraction working as designed.

The Universe Laws are unerring. The laws of attraction works very simply, vibrate…attract, vibrate…attract, vibrate…attract. Each moment of every day it matches to your vibration. Every thought and belief has a vibration. Raise the vibration of your thoughts and you will raise your attraction. Stop that lower thought in its tracks and choose a higher one.

Do the inner work necessary to find the core cause of what you are creating in your world. Take responsibility and realize you are no victim… no one is. Know that you are an all powerful being, created in the image and likeness of God and all deserving for all the blessings this Universe has to give you. It just waits for you to make a choice. How do you make that choice? By your belief and knowing… free choice is how you command the Universe.

It is time to not look down, it is time to fly, and it is time to be happy and to receive. As Neo said at the end of the first Matrix…before he did his Superman impersonation…

“I know you’re out there. I can feel you now. I know that you’re afraid… you’re afraid of us. You’re afraid of change. I don’t know the future. I didn’t come here to tell you how this is going to end. I came here to tell you how it’s going to begin. I’m going to hang up this phone, and then I’m going to show these people what you don’t want them to see. I’m going to show them a world without you. A world without rules and controls, without borders or boundaries. A world where anything is possible. Where we go from there is a choice I leave to you.”

Neo was talking about the Matrix, created by the machines which were the gate keepers much like our Ego or belief system is our gatekeeper to our desires. If you replace “you’re” with Ego this will apply very nicely as an analogy for real life. As you can see, Neo didn’t care about the future but about right now, the beginning, in this moment. And as he saw quite clearly, the Matrix was an illusion, thus he knew that his world from that moment was “without rules and controls, without borders or boundaries, a world where anything is possible!” See, it is your belief system that is holding you hostage so it is time to take the red pill.

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